I’m not sure when it became socially acceptable to bring up a person’s weight or frame in conversation; especially when you don’t know them! I am a very thin person; always have been this way. I’m petite! I’m all of 4’10 and under 100 pounds. This seems to bug complete strangers or amaze them, because they always have something to say about it. It’s very rude and annoying!
Just yesterday, I was at the diner with my husband and my son, enjoying a nice lunch after church. Once we were done, I asked the waitress for a box, so I can take the other half of my chicken parm sandwich and curly fries. She laughed, a very sweet laugh and said, “I knew you’d want a box! You’re so tiny”. Um….OK. I’m sure she was just trying to be funny and nice and personable, especially so she can get a tip, but speaking about how tiny I am because I didn’t finish my food, doesn’t make me feel comfortable at all. It’s rather rude. I told my husband that she wouldn’t have gone up to a larger person and laughed because “she knew he wouldn’t NEED a box for leftovers”. I mean think about it. If you think commenting about a heavy person is rude and embarrassing, why not feel that way about a “tiny” petite person? We don’t need commentary about our weight.
I’ve had strangers ask me if I eat. YES! Completely strangers have asked if I eat food, because I’m petite or they have TOLD me that I need to eat. Now I’ve always been anxious, so at these comments, I would get embarrassed and let off an uncomfortable giggle and put my head down. Now, not so much. It is rude and I let them know it is rude! You do not know me. You have no right to ask if I eat or TELL me I need to eat. How can they not realize it’s rude?? It’s become socially acceptable for people to make rude comments to others. I don’t know if they feel it isn’t rude because I’m not a heavy person. Or because I look very young. Either way, it’s FAR from okay people. You don’t know if I have health problems: I suffer from acid reflux. Also have a fast metabolism. You don’t know don’t know if it’s genetics: So many members in my family were teeny tiny just like me for years and years. They don’t know me at all to be asking me these things.
One time I had a neighbor tell me I look very young (I’m 32 but people think I’m a teenager) and she said I’m skinny then asked me if I eat. I looked at her, smiled and said What kind of questions is that?? Of course I eat! You don’t need to ask me that. She didn’t know what to say. Her face got serious and she walked away without a word. I will no longer accept people’s rudeness.
I won’t let them ask me these questions or make rude comments to me, without me speaking up for myself. So many times, I feel like being rude right back, and telling them if THEY stopped eating so much, then I’ll have enough food to eat, hahaha, BUT two wrongs don’t make a right. I will not embarrass someone just to make myself feel better. After all, isn’t that what they are doing? Let’s stop body shaming each other and just live our own lives without making people feel terrible about themselves. I have a hard enough time loving my body and accepting who I am, without someone else putting their two sense in, making me feel worse. I am learning to love myself and stand up for myself. Let’s all think before we speak and be kind to one another.