Why are Friendships so Difficult?

It’s difficult being an adult! Navigating friendships as a grown up isn’t as easy as it was when I was younger. Now there are so many rules! It doesn’t even matter if I’ve been friends with someone for YEARS, the fact that we are in our 30’s and have spouses and children, the rules seem to be different. Especially if a significant other is not happy about the friendship. It’s hard to stop being friends with someone I’ve known since the age of 4! It’s probably difficult though because the friendship is with the opposite sex. But even though that may be the case for this friendship, I have friendships that are with females and even those are difficult to maneuver at times. Trying to get together is almost impossible, as well as trying to speak on the phone. Speaking about life in about 60 minutes when we actually do get together, and then going our separate ways afterwards, feeling like I still need more. Wanting to call friends on the phone, knowing you really can’t because they are probably just as exhausted and stressed out as you are or not wanting to disturb their down time. When we were younger, we would call each other at any time of day, without worry. We would talk for hours, no children interrupting or being rude. Things just seem so difficult now as an adult. Why are there so many rules!? 😦 Anyone else out there with similar issues? Any advice?

Jen, xo


“She picked up the pieces of her life and created something beautiful. From that day forth she shone like the sun and changed the definition of broken”. -Randall M. Core

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18 thoughts on “Why are Friendships so Difficult?

  1. I definitely hear this. My best girlfriends and I haven’t even seen each other in about 3 years… we all moved out of the city at the same time and while we live within driving distance of each other I never seem to be able to make plans. Everyone is so busy with life and stress… I think it’s a generational thing. Everyone is working so hard to make ends meet right now that there’s no time for fun. 😭

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  2. Wow! This is so true. I’m still a teen so I have quite the number of friends and a lot of time to hang out. But, I always wonder why my mum doesn’t have friends anymore. I guess its because she’s busy and the potential friends are also busy. Even though I’m yet to experience this, I believe it doesn’t have to be this way. I’m sure if my mum really wanted to, she could have mad out time to hang out with a friend maybe once in two weeks. Make out time even if it means you, your friend and your kids as well hanging out. I’m sure you and your friends would be happy.

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    1. Thanks! It’s not as easy as you think lol. Trust me when I tell you parents would LOVE to go out with friends alone and leave the kids at home. So once every 2 weeks is not easy to do especially with young kids and being in school (my friend and I are back in college), friend just moved 2 hours away and is looking for work. I have class then have to pick up my son. My other friend just had her 2nd baby, my other friend is in Fl and I’m in NJ. So it’s very difficult getting together. We try our best to stay in touch but we all understand the reasons why we rarely see each other. Life just gets in the way. Seeing each other once a month or every other month is such a treat! lok

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      1. Wow! I guess I really don’t understand. At least, its great that you guys understand why you can’t hang out and take the opportunity when you can. I guess that’s true friendship. I just wish it was easier.

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  3. I have my best friends since the age of 13, and we make time for each other, at least once a year we go on a weekend trip close to home so we spend quality time together. When the kids were younger it was harder but you actually have to make. Plan! I need them and we talk all the time. I don’t know how I’d survive without them. It has been 33 years we are friends!

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